Due to a high fever that I developed when I was in junior high school, my hearing is moderately impaired. For a person with a hearing impairment, life is a lot tougher. In the past, I felt extremely frustrated and helpless just from watching the impatient expressions of people with whom I was talking. Regardless of how many talents and abilities I had, I felt constrained. Even for a natural optimist like myself, under such circumstances, I unconsciously developed a psychological imbalance. It was like a double edged sword that injured others and myself as well. I often regretted and blamed myself; but still, I was unable to control my feelings of complaint.

After initiation, I had a chance to work at Hsihu Center and clearly felt the power from Master's great magnetic field. I was determined to regain the happy life that I had known before; the negative powers of dissatisfied complaint, jealousy and unfairness had tortured my soul for too long. I prayed in my heart for Master's help and

blessings; meanwhile, I introspected and engaged in self-criticism. I started to search within, and again began to look at everyone and everything in a positive way. When I let go of all my prejudices, my heart opened up and I was filled with peace and joy. I regained my love and compassion; I learned how to love myself and others as well. I gained more confidence and composure. The disciple who used to watch Master only from afar, now dares to come near Her to enjoy Her boundless love.

To emphasize the importance of cultivating one's spiritual practice, Master has often quoted the ancient saying: "Develop your spiritual self, achieve unity in your family; then run the nation well, and thereby, pacify the world." It is true that when one reforms oneself, the whole world is reformed. Our job, spiritual life, marriage, family, education of the next generation, and so on are all interrelated. If we follow Master's teaching that "to do everything wholeheartedly is Zen," we will make definite progress in our spiritual practice.

Early this year, a fellow practitioner told me, "A great Master in Formosa has published a Buddhist book, and many people think that it is different than the ordinary Buddhist books." Carelessly, I answered the practitioner, "Oh, yes? Let me have a look and point out the faults in this book."

This initiate handed the book to me very reverently. That evening at home, I opened the wrapping paper and looked at it. Master's photo, and the title of the book "Key of Immediate Enlightenment" shone into my eyes. I was totally shocked! Usually stubborn and arrogant, I felt like I was struck by a blow on the head! A strong sense of shame flooded my heart.

I regretted very much my stubbornness and arrogance. Why did I jump to the conclusion that I could find 'fault' with Master even before I had studied Her teachings? Why was I so arrogant? I wanted to find the 'faults' in Master, but conversely, Master instantly grasped the faults in me -- arrogance, stubbornness and ignorance.

Truly, who else in this world can be so compassionate and able to recover the 'Key of Immediate Enlightenment' for ignorant human beings? At that moment, I had the feeling that Supreme Master Ching Hai could be a living Buddha returning to this world. A warm current flowed uncontrollably into my heart. While being ashamed of my ignorance and arrogance, I was also feeling extremely fortunate for having the opportunity to meet this living Buddha and Her teachings in my present life.

After receiving the invisible 'blow on the head,' my mind became much clearer. Unlike my usual self, I opened Master's book carefully with veneration. I was stunned by the words: "The level of a great enlightened Master is not to be touched by ordinary human abilities or languages of the world. Any efforts at trying to illustrate Her thoughts and life can hardly grasp a fraction of it." Until then, my original intention and courage to find fault with Master had completely vanished. Strangely, my attitude changed course rapidly, and I couldn't wait to explore Master's teachings. Suddenly, I recalled Shakyamuni Buddha's teachings: "The human body is difficult to obtain. The Buddha's teachings are rarely to be heard!" I became very anxious. "Hurry up! Read the book now!"

My earnestness made me forget the time. Fortunately, I was in the habit of not eating after noon. Hours elapsed, and I even forgot about my dinner.

Wow! That was incredible! I was supposed to find fault with Master, but conversely, for the whole evening, Master found all the faults in me! At one moment, tears flooded my eyes. At another moment, I was filled with heavenly bliss. Then, suddenly, I laughed cheerfully. Next, I was overwhelmed by shame. Now and then, I murmured to myself: "Fantastic! Incredible! This is wonderful!" Not knowing my feelings, people thought that I was insane!

It was true that I had studied and researched the Buddhist teachings for many years. Observing the heap of Buddhist books beyond even my own height, I thought I was great, and more knowledgeable than my fellow practitioners. Very often, I could not control my arrogance. But I became frightened after reading Master's teachings. Fortunately, I had met an enlightened Master in time. Otherwise, I would be in grave danger. My knowledge and learning had become an obstacle that almost denied me from developing a grand affinity with Master.

Reading through Master's sample booklet in a hurry, all sorts of feelings welled up in my mind, and was deeply touched that there is hope for human beings, for sentient beings, for the world and the universe! Master is truly the most merciful Quan Yin Bodhisattva manifesting, and a true living Buddha! Master is 'faultless'! She has the most perfect soul in the world! Her quality is the noblest in the universe! Her spirit is forever sound! I dare to declare: No ordinary humans in this world could ever find any 'fault' in Master!

After reading Master's sample booklet, I could not wait any longer, not even for another day! I wrote immediately to Master requesting initiation so that I could practice the Quan Yin Method. Master painstakingly reminds us: "It is a great pity to waste the human body." The human body is extremely precious, because our own master is inside. We are most fortunate to have met an enlightened Master. The opportunity of getting initiation and practicing the highest of all methods -- the Quan Yin Method -- is rare to attain even once in innumerable aeons. We should learn humbly, and practice according to the method instructed. If we are still full of doubts, just as when I wanted to find fault with Master before, we will be forever regretful, because we will never be able to exit the three realms!

Although I have been initiated for many years, all the while my family did not understand me. However, various incidents that happened this year have made me realize -- Oh! My family members have turned out to be the best dharma guards. Thank You Master!

Following my initiation, all aspects of my family life improved steadily, but then my father-in-law began to create all sorts of difficulties for me. He made trouble willfully, especially when all my sons wished to become vegetarian spiritual practitioners as well. Not being able to stand him anymore, I once talked back to him. Suddenly, I remembered Master's teaching: "Treat your family members with love, practice humility...." Then I obtained instant enlightenment -- so, it was a lesson and a test for me! Fortunately, Master reminded me in time, and let me understand this; I then could handle unfavorable situations with greater patience, and walk the spiritual path with greater determination. Since then, besides fulfilling my obligations in the family, I also have practiced more diligently, and eagerly participated in various tasks in the meditation center. I ceased to defy the reproaches from my relatives, but prayed to Master instead, wishing that I had greater compassion to handle unreasonable situations or demands.

Finally, a turning point occurred. Surprisingly, my father-in-law suggested arranging a vegetarian birthday feast for his grand birthday celebration this year. Extremely delighted at heart, I was most grateful for Master's care. I expended every possible effort to prepare the vegetarian feast to perfection, hoping that everyone would enjoy it. The result turned out to be that, not only was the whole family satisfied, but even my younger sister-in-law who used to seriously misunderstand me, made this statement: "Since vegetarian food is so delicious and tasty, why don't we, the whole family, switch to a vegetarian diet from now on?" A son of my elder brother-in-law even asked to receive initiation.

Through several years of hardships and struggles, I finally won the acceptance and support of my family!

Some family members may obstruct our spiritual practice, but they are really dharma guards reminding us of the preciousness of spiritual practice, so that we are not sluggish. From the changes in my family, I realized that the only way to enrich our lives and make them more colorful and meaningful, is to follow in the footsteps of an enlightened Master, and thus expand our love power!